Just a pleasant twist of the arm before I start, Three Ways: The Ways In is now available, check out the first chapter here, and get your copy on Amazon Australia, Amazon Canada, Amazon UK, and Amazon US!
Hi guys,
Yep, I missed last fortnight. Nope, I was not in a blogging mood. Things have been, well, interesting and tiring me out. The joys of taking on other roles courtesy of the Golden Crowned Lurgy… and losing hours courtesy of the Golden Crowned Lurgy.
Yep, I missed last fortnight. Nope, I was not in a blogging mood. Things have been, well, interesting and tiring me out. The joys of taking on other roles courtesy of the Golden Crowned Lurgy… and losing hours courtesy of the Golden Crowned Lurgy.
Yes, COVID19 has
finally hit my wallet, and I don’t know how I feel about it. Don’t get me
wrong, I get it, a business’ role is to continue indefinitely into the future.
Though why I’m losing a certain amount and the big boss half that is beyond me.
Guess I’m a little jealous. It’s just, well… it just is. So, GCL 1, Trent meh.
It’s not the end
of the world, I’ve taken my measures to stay above water, so I can say I’m
lucky in that regard. How many are unlucky? I don’t know. But I do miss my
colleagues, and it’s a lonely time at the desk. Running is okay – ooh, did I
mention I’m running food again?! – but, yeah, still lonely.
So, what does
anything of this have to do with disconnection? Given I’ve been okay with
online church services, zoom recovery, a friend’s zoom sermon last night? It’s
in me.
I haven’t been
writing very well. What little I’ve done on The Ways Out is bore-inspiring. Not
the writing, that’s on point, and the chapters are going in a direction I like.
The motivation has been, well… it just is. Writer’s Block 1, Trent meh.
But I’ve had a killer cyberpunk idea that
would likely stretch into a series, I sat down to a fantasy with an epic fight
against wild boars that’s probably going to stretch into a series with GOT
level background, and I want to write action, just not the one idea I want to
do. But… I don’t know. Am I missing out with no sales of TWI? Am I just
approaching TWO against the back to front direction I had planned?
Knowing me, it’s
probably a mix of things, hit home in my work change that’s playing up with my
bipolar, and spurred on by that lack of sales. And being my story, nobody
reading is purpose. Oh, and speaking of bipolar, it’s a dosage change on the
cards, I don’t know if I’m yay or neigh.
Yeah, that’s a
deliberate play on words. All meh aside, I can still smile, still connect,
still serve customers while feeling this disconnect in myself and in the
post-GCL world…
Sometimes, I
feel fake – good old impostor syndrome. It takes a lot of energy to be on
display as I am, though I am managing the busy and only serve one customer at a
time, even with the phone ringing. It’s doable but has some weight. Hell, it
takes a lot of energy just to be me, even when I sit down to write, or have a
very awkward question put to me by a dating match – no, I’m not going there,
but, yeah, it was, just, well…
I’m going with
everything is playing up on me now. I’ll just sift through the pieces as I go,
put the puzzle together when I can, and worry about today. At least I know I’m
connected to that.
Here’s to another
fortnight, catch you again soon, and have a good one,
T.M.
