Hi guys,
You know Hosea’s gonna be bad when chapter
one, verse two features the instruction “go marry a whore.”
I’ve been reading the prophets for Lent.
The Bible quiz said I should dive in to the Good Book... Okay, the older part
of the Good Book... Alright the bit better known as The Good, Bad, and Ugly
book, emphasis on the ugly.
So far out of Isaiah, Jeremiah, and
Ezekiel, it’s lots of the sword, famine, and plague, idolatry likened to
adultery (and vivid promiscuity for epic Egyptian dong in Ezzo).
Such a colourful bunch, and quite a preachy
bunch. Issy went naked for three years. Jezza prophesied for twenty odd years, after which he was
kidnapped and dragged to Egypt. Nice holiday? Nope, Egypt copped a spray of incoming
wrath. Mic, dropped.
Ezekiel? Tied himself up on his right side
for a couple of months, left a couple, eating food cooked over poo. Um, yummo?
Oh, and the best bit? Told by God he won’t be listened to. Still went dope on
the mic, still dropped it.
Welcome to my faith. No, I’m not going to
convert you, but I’ll save you the read of said prophets, though: “Stop that
infernal pagan stuff, we’re gonna get wiped big time, but it’s gonna be sweet
after, you’ll see!”
So, how did I get here? I was pretty much a
science, logic, “smarter than holier thou,” atheist whose first hope at fame is
a fantasy where the pagans fight off Christian invaders. Well, except for the
voice behind my ear that saved my life at 18, a voice I just knew I could
trust.
Yes, I had an experience that I couldn’t
explain. Then four years ago, I had one you’d probably (correctly) put down to
going off my meds and not sleeping for three days. Long story short, I wound up
strapped down, sedated, and held overnight in hospital. And a day later, I rocked
up to church.
I’ll keep it as a story for another time,
but as it so happens, that latest book of mine which explores the part of me I
would put on hold in a relationship, became exploration put on hold for my
chosen religion.
Prophetic? Umm, maybe? I don’t know, things
can work out in ways you wouldn’t expect, or might not find out unless you find
God mathematically by answering that age-old conundrum, dividing by zero. Let’s
just say that and a branch of metaphysics blew my mind... And could potentially
blow yours, or someone else’s.
I’ll save that formula, lesson, and story
for another time. The only Lentmassy thing I’ll ask of you is, if you can, go
give $10 to a charity; or, if you do need the help, don’t be afraid to approach
one.
Hopefully peace unto you all, and have a
good one!
T.M.
