Saturday 19 March 2016

And now back to the wall... err the writing... HEY COOL, VAULT 81!

   Hey guys!

   Yes it has been a while. In fact it's 85 days since my last post.

   So what have I been up to? Sadly I have not been fighting my way out of a parallel universe tempting me with lots of places to discover, go into at will or as directed by certain factions who will go unnamed wearing nothing but something blue with the numbers 111 on the back... okay, I have gotten a little into Fallout 4, but no, I haven't sunk into a writer's abyss.

   In fact, I've joined a social writing group on meetup.com, and pop out there every now and then, as well as do some editing in my spare time, gradually working down the page count of Three Ways' first part - and at last managing to get in all I need to get in for that part by stripping out the portions of the story I no longer require.

   This included deleting an entire chapter of a character and situation I was wanting to explore, but ultimately took up 7 very precious pages and, like Lizard on a Stick (for anybody who's seen Conan the Barbarian - THE ORIGINAL ONE WITH ARNOLD - you'll know what I mean), got the chop.

   In fact, a lot of things have had the chop, including character developments that seemed like a good idea at the time, characters who seemed like a good idea at the time, plot arcs that, well, you should have a good picture by now. Some have been easy, some have been, "how can I work this feeling in" and one or two have been deciding what to pull the plug on.

   But this is this writer's life, what doesn't float my boat gets tipped over the side (or sometimes thrown into the back of the freezer - a pagan city of Caral-Muar, some street known as the Avenue of Heroes, and a famous Boadicea-like character known as the Bloodqueen were thawed out and cooked up with the rest of Hero of Talbadas). As for timing, well, I'm sort of getting there, I'll finish this editing to get the writing leaner, get those page counts down, keeping in mind the lessons of getting TSH edited - then look at Part 2 and the wonders of CONFLICT!

   Yay!

   Of course, this is alongside a great many other things, including getting life back on track. I know I've intimated this before but, well, last year saw me depart my relationship, and I'm now going it alone in my own place, seeing my little one pretty regularly (the benefit of still working near where he lives), and leaving behind what, if I'm completely honest, wasn't the best for me and that I wasn't the best in.

   But positive steps have been made, as well as the contrite understanding that, all the messy trauma I've dealt with in my life, the poor and conflicted parenting, the constant moving, the school bullying, constant negation by one who really should love me, getting sexually assaulted as a child, are the main reasons I had a psychotic episode, and developed depression and anxiety, with a side of PTSD

   The CSA and PTSD has been EDMR'd. Now the anxiety and depression is getting SNRI'd by my old friend Venlafaxine (sure I've been exhibiting a lot of raver gaze lately, but my current mood is awesome - I even love the menial admin job I do!). And while the writing and even the gaming has taken a bit of a back seat, there's a park near mine with outdoor gym equipment - I'm doing reps and hitting the elliptical, WOO!

   So yeah, I'm plodding on in life, working on being the best dad I can be, loving the time I have with my son (still 99% well behaved, and getting taller and hungrier and wordier), and going back on from strength to strength while dealing with day to day things (speaking of which, rego due).

   Well that's me done with updates and changes, I'm going back to life, hope you're doing well with yours, and I'll get back soon with updates.

   Peace out, live long and prosper, the force will be with you always, and as always:

   Have a good one!
   T. M.

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